8-16 / FB Post
So I did not report to work today because I am feverish and feeling awefully bad. I was coughing and sneezing so bad that I can't hardly breath when I woke up. So I got up tried to dress up for work but end up sending sms to our school admin&acad to tell them that I can't make it. Maybe something inside is welling up and it is affecting me outwards.
I haven't talked to mama for a week until today when suddenly after talking to her, I felt so much better. Funny isn't it? she is like a medicine. I am 25, and yes I am still a mama's girl. Not to mention talking to dee put a smile on my face too.
Today, I knew that bears are real and they are not the usual cuddly huggable bear that we know of. Mama, dee and my sisters went to Montana for a family reunion and like a 7y.o child .. they tell me stories that really captivates my heart, they showed me photos of them in the place where mountains are so cool with all the animals like deers around it. It's my kind of fairytale .. OUTDOORS. It was followed with a really cool question like "when is the next climb?" and "you may have to get a tent .. this and that" can you imagine a little kid throwing tantrooms and being bribed on? that's the picture.
Who am I and what I'm worth is something that I should never forget, I should know that in every season, my parents love me and more that HE does. Why? because I am me and I am chosen. And it cannot be changed no matter what I do wrong, no matter how bad I feel or no matter how undeserving I can be.
Reflecting from the word given last sunday, reading from the book of Ephesians. Knowing who we are changes the way we think, often we forget about how blessed we are and see things just like the norm. I am sick or should i say I was but now I am healed. In John 1:12-13 it says Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband’s will, but born of God. I am His child and He owns my life.,sure SEALED.
I will be made complete in Him .. and the rest will come as a bonus. I am a work in progress, i'll get there soon.
Friday, September 30, 2011
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
When things are too annoying ...
One kid is crying and the rest are busy making noise, one child comes to me asking to unbutton his pants coz he needs to pee while another child is calling because he needs a tissue to blow on. On the other corner are 2kids going under the table and ripping off my table sidings as another one hurt another unintentionally. Imagine it happening all at the same time and if you are not patient enough .. you might decide to just leave the room and sleep at home. "Lord, where are you? I need a whole bunch of grace"
Just so you know, we have a presentation this Friday and I am so pressured about teaching my kids with all the correct lyrics and actions of our song. I tell you, it isn't easy and their "being a child" adds up to making it more difficult. I don't know what happened to them today .. they were so unruly I felt so helpless getting their attention and have them obey me. I almost cried at that very minute and for the first time I raised my voice really high and suddenly it's like the earth stopped revolving .. looking at their innocent faces hurried on their chairs sat up straight and look at me I felt guilty and I hope I hadn't. So for that, I owe them an apology tomorrow.
You may probably read my post about all the fun-talks I had with the kids., my others friends are actually waiting when I'm going to share another while others say that they want to be a pre-school teacher too. So if you do too, this is the other side of being one.
Everyday, when I come to work I consistently ask God to make me come prepared, filter my thoughts, my heart and my mouth that I may only speak life towards them and show them the most sincere and kindest acts that I could. I hug them, kiss them and often reassure them of their worth because I love them and I know that it is my job to do so. But somehow, I lose track. I got tired and I feared that I almost swayed my way out.
....to be continued.
Just so you know, we have a presentation this Friday and I am so pressured about teaching my kids with all the correct lyrics and actions of our song. I tell you, it isn't easy and their "being a child" adds up to making it more difficult. I don't know what happened to them today .. they were so unruly I felt so helpless getting their attention and have them obey me. I almost cried at that very minute and for the first time I raised my voice really high and suddenly it's like the earth stopped revolving .. looking at their innocent faces hurried on their chairs sat up straight and look at me I felt guilty and I hope I hadn't. So for that, I owe them an apology tomorrow.
You may probably read my post about all the fun-talks I had with the kids., my others friends are actually waiting when I'm going to share another while others say that they want to be a pre-school teacher too. So if you do too, this is the other side of being one.
Everyday, when I come to work I consistently ask God to make me come prepared, filter my thoughts, my heart and my mouth that I may only speak life towards them and show them the most sincere and kindest acts that I could. I hug them, kiss them and often reassure them of their worth because I love them and I know that it is my job to do so. But somehow, I lose track. I got tired and I feared that I almost swayed my way out.
....to be continued.
Monday, August 15, 2011
TIME OF MY LIFE
Life has it's own set of phase .. and timing has a lot to do with what could happen. I am trying to look at my life's Gannt Chart as I am listening to the song "Time of your life" by Greenday. Staring at the clear blue sky with a strong wind come rushing through my face by the window .. I say a little prayer to God.
I am asking God to search my heart as I am seeking Him earnestly at this point of time, He is so silent that He is making me want to reach out for Him all the more. I am waiting and waiting is sometimes awkward. I don't like the feeling, I don't like the season, I want to fast it forward but if I do .. I may miss out the vitals.
Perhaps I have forgotten who am I and fail to also remember that my timing is different from God's. You know that with too much people going I somehow felt left behind. I don't easily adopt to change .. well who does? .. so here am I on a pruning phase and I am just excited about what the next phase would be.
I am asking God to search my heart as I am seeking Him earnestly at this point of time, He is so silent that He is making me want to reach out for Him all the more. I am waiting and waiting is sometimes awkward. I don't like the feeling, I don't like the season, I want to fast it forward but if I do .. I may miss out the vitals.
Perhaps I have forgotten who am I and fail to also remember that my timing is different from God's. You know that with too much people going I somehow felt left behind. I don't easily adopt to change .. well who does? .. so here am I on a pruning phase and I am just excited about what the next phase would be.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
My mama .. bow :)
It is never without my mama will I be who I am today. At the thought of missing her., I just want to honor her with this blog.
I thank God not for the kind of mama He gave me but for who my mama is. A perfectly imperfect mama who stood by me from the moment when my knees are still weak to stand. My mind cannot remember the first time I saw her face nor I can tell when I first hear her voice .. but I know she do know when she first see and heard mine. Growing up, I never see her fought with pop and never did she throw angry words on us. She has been the greatest model of my life. Living in the truth of what life is.
I have likes that she don't agree on, but she supports it and that is what I love about her the most. I sometimes fail, but she remained to be my number one fan of all times. I screw up and she allow me to swallow the pain and help me get healed after then. My mama.. sometimes it is so annoying to hear her say this and that but I miss is when she don't.
Wish you were here ma. I love you.
I thank God not for the kind of mama He gave me but for who my mama is. A perfectly imperfect mama who stood by me from the moment when my knees are still weak to stand. My mind cannot remember the first time I saw her face nor I can tell when I first hear her voice .. but I know she do know when she first see and heard mine. Growing up, I never see her fought with pop and never did she throw angry words on us. She has been the greatest model of my life. Living in the truth of what life is.
I have likes that she don't agree on, but she supports it and that is what I love about her the most. I sometimes fail, but she remained to be my number one fan of all times. I screw up and she allow me to swallow the pain and help me get healed after then. My mama.. sometimes it is so annoying to hear her say this and that but I miss is when she don't.
Wish you were here ma. I love you.
Monday, July 18, 2011
CHANGE
How do you go about changes? allow me to quote a line from my favorite series Smallville "Life is about change, sometimes its painful .. sometimes its beautiful, but most of the time its both" - Lana Lang.
And as they say, change is the only constant thing on earth aside from my own belief that God's love is. Oh well, I know that we all go through all sorts of changes in life but you see .. it is taking me a while to embrace changes that entails being away from people who I am used to spending time with. Talk about maturity .. I hate the fact that as we mature or grow older we get to part ways with our closest friends or worst with our family members because we have separate lives to live and yea .. sometimes it happens in different places too. Ooh .. I don't even know where this blog is taking me. Maybe I need to get on to bed now and wake up early to jog a bit.
I love you :)
And as they say, change is the only constant thing on earth aside from my own belief that God's love is. Oh well, I know that we all go through all sorts of changes in life but you see .. it is taking me a while to embrace changes that entails being away from people who I am used to spending time with. Talk about maturity .. I hate the fact that as we mature or grow older we get to part ways with our closest friends or worst with our family members because we have separate lives to live and yea .. sometimes it happens in different places too. Ooh .. I don't even know where this blog is taking me. Maybe I need to get on to bed now and wake up early to jog a bit.
I love you :)
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